He turned around and his eyes nearly flew from my face as he came eye to crotch with a leather-clad, fishnet-wearing, whip-carrying, seven-foot tall amazon of a woman that looked like Xena Warrior Princess on steroids. Her hair was so black that it looked blue and her massive breasts were oozing out of the bustier’s bodice, ready to fall on his face and suffocate the very life out of him.

” Where’s Spartacus”? Jerry asked in a confused high-pitched whisper.

“You can call me, Spartamatrix. I am here with my Sleestack Vagina Warriors to laser everything with a penis except for a chosen few whom we may find worthy of being our sexual slaves. We may have to laser the Dude there, but you Jerry… you have got that special something.”

“Spartamatrix!” hissed Spartacus, through cherry red lips as she narrowed her baby blue eyes and heaved her healthy bosom.

“Yes, I have returned with my Vagina Warriors, Spartacus, as I promised two thousand years ago, when I warned the earthlings to treat women with more respect, to worship women’s bodies rather than scorn them, to not treat them like cattle. Nothing has redeemed the male earthlings in 2000 years; now, I am here to laser the penises. And you can not stop me this time. Oh, and we want that Sarah Palin bitch, too.”