Chapter 9

Jerry & the Dude walked across the empty lot. On the build­ing, Jerry could barely make out the rem­nants of a neglected sign. “7th Street Motors?” Jerry ques­tioned out-loud.

That was the name of the car lot that used to be here.” Dude informed.

But we’re on Main Street.”

Yes, well dur­ing the unfor­tu­nate mishap of 2009, & sub­se­quent scan­dal that broke out, 7th Street Motors moved here to try to dis­tance them­selves from the whole mess. It didn’t work”

Scan­dal?”

Yeah, there used to be this line of import cars that had some prob­lems with uncon­trol­lable accel­er­a­tion, non-functioning brakes & ques­tion­able steer­ing. Well, after the law­suits were all set­tled, the auto-empire own­ers retired & sold off every­thing that was left. It was shipped to the states & ended up here.”

Jerry looked at the build­ing & then back at the Dude, “There must not have been much.”

No, but it is exactly what we need.” Dude opened a door & stepped inside.

They were greeted by a curly black haired man sport­ing a beard & glasses. Jerry stared, try­ing to place where he rec­og­nized him from. Then he spoke, “Wel­come, wel­come to ‘Lum­ber­jack Motors’!” He spread his arm out in an exager­ated ges­ture for the 3 vehi­cles in the dusty showroom.

Henry?” Jerry asked.

Yes?”

Henry Kriegel?”

Yes?!”

Of the Boze­man Tea Party?”

Yeah.”

But, you dis­ap­peared 3 years ago, after a 4th of July anti-the-Lumberjacks-rally-rally.”

No, no. That was just a rumour that Tea Party started spread­ing before they dis­banded. I had a change of heart & joined up with the “Gay Lum­ber­jacks For Jesus”. That really pissed them off for a while, so they started spread­ing these rumours. How­ever, appar­ently the Tea Party couldn’t sur­vive with­out a cha­ras­matic leader, so they kind of just fiz­zled out. And, once they were gone, the whole ‘Lum­ber­jack’ thing didn’t really have a pur­pose, so most of us have sus­pended activ­ity until we’re needed again.”

You are.” the Dude interjected.

What do you need?” Henry’s eyes lit up.

A Car.…”

Oh.” The light of polit­i­cal intrigue dimmed.

And to talk to Helga.”

The mechanic?”

Yes.”

Henry left them in the show­room. The Dude approached the Prius & popped the hood. “This one should do”.

Do What?” a slightly husky female voice asked.

As the Dude slammed the hood. Jerry spun around to see a woman of great ath­letic stature ( not to men­tion a decent rack, at least that he could imag­ine from the sil­louhette of the cov­er­alls). She looked capa­ble of bench-pressing TH400 trans­mis­sion bolted to a 454 chevy big block. What was she doing work­ing on these tinker-toy imports?

The Dude smiled, “Jerry, this is Spartacus.”

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